Let’s All Just be Honest about Parades



The St. Patties Day Parade is going on a block from me

On Fifth Avenue.

I really hate parades.

I do.


I’m sorry but throngs of humanity rubbing stupid elbows

Make me want to throw away my encyclopedia of the universe.


My wife sends me on an errand to 5th and 72nd.

A bunch of high school girls walk by playing horns.

Idiots blowing air.


I would stay and see what’s up

But I am feeling down and want to get away from the crowds.

I hate them.


But in a little corner of my psychological map

I am somewhat thrilled by their enthusiasm.

Maybe I should stay?


I think of the Clash singing “Should I stay or should I go?

I go.


I don’t want to see the happy gay contingent.

De Blasio is so thrilled with himself by including them marching.

He thinks he is the voice of New York.

He is the expelled gas.

Marching is kind of a gay thing to do anyway.


What’s it to me and what are they to my life?

I don’t care.

I breathe the air of my own reality and my values so different

From the majorettes of political correctness.


F..k St. Patties Day  Parade.

F..k every parade there ever was or will be.


Parades are militaristic groupings carrying tubas instead of guns.

Make me no part of this.

I am not the idiot in the celebration of the trivial.

I am not the emptiness of an annoying drum.

The views expressed in this opinion article are solely those of their author and are not necessarily either shared or endorsed by EagleRising.com

Join the conversation!

We have no tolerance for comments containing violence, racism, vulgarity, profanity, all caps, or discourteous behavior. Thank you for partnering with us to maintain a courteous and useful public environment where we can engage in reasonable discourse.

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!

Send this to a friend