Thanksgiving without Boxcutters

Back to a simpler time. The first Thanksgiving. Squanto and Chief Massasoit saved the Pilgrims bacon…or venison…or turkey stuffing. If it hadn’t been for their encounter with Christian Indians, Squanto and Massasoit, both of whom had been to England previously, the Pilgrims (half of whom had died on the trans-Atlantic sail) would have died of starvation in the midst of nature’s plenty in New England. Another overlooked important character in the Pilgrims’ drama of survival was Miles Standish. He was hired muscle along for the ride and to  provide protection from any hostiles. He was a military mercenary. He had served previously in the war between Spain and Holland. He had been captured by the Spanish and sold into slavery to some Islamic clown. As should be noted …slavery in the middle east and the New World did not start with a bunch of fat cat, cigar munching, old, conservative, gun-clinging white dudes (as your public school board and all liberals would have your children believe) on July 4, 1776. Look it up.

Anyway…the cartoon joke relies on the following information. Apparently, Standish’s Koran believing owner was not benevolent. In fact, Standish’s servitude/slavery was so unpleasant he opted for a life on the lam. He killed his owner and decamped, eventually returning to England where he set up shop again as a mercenary and was hired by William Bradford to cross the Pond and protect (and train) the textile producing (weavers), non-agrarian Pilgrims. Maybe he expected to find Islamic slave traders in the New World. In any event, he was a “get ‘er done” sort of guy and set New World Englishmen on the path towards the Second Amendment…in addition to “government of the people, by the people, (defended by the people) and for the people.

And remember, as the Pilgrims quickly learned…the First Amendment is made possible largely by virtue of the Second…and, of course by God’s Almighty, Providential and Merciful Hand. If you doubt that last statement, read the “Organic Writings” of the Founders. Perusing the pages of Holy Writ would also be very profitable…as well as wonderfully encouraging during these dark days.

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About the author

Stephen Bowers

Stephen Bowers

I am an attorney in Las Vegas who has always wanted to draw political cartoons, partly because I like drawing, but mostly because I enjoy ridiculing pompous know-nothings. Verbally debating them gets nowhere. They don't know they're beaten. But poking fun at them in a drawing leaves them without recourse or rebuttal. What can they do...? Call me names, whine, cuss me ... or maybe draw a witty riposte? Unlikely.
Steve Bowers, Esq.

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