The Terrifying Importance of Poll Workers

It’s not who votes that counts, it’s who counts the votes – Joseph Stalin

I will be working at the polls on Tuesday, Election Day.  Here is a review of what happened the last time I was a poll worker.  I look forward to our takeover of the senate and hope to have lots to tell you about my experiences after the election.

Remember last time I worked at the polls?  I was all doe-eyed and super focused on ferreting out voter fraud.

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Well, this time, I was a hardened, seasoned poll worker.

Funny how that happens.

The poll worker program is grueling.  This motley band of un and underemployed individuals has to meet the evening before the election at 6:00 to get everything organized and declare party affiliation to ensure that a Republican and Democrat are available for all important matters – counting, dropping off ballots at the board of elections, etc.

Then, these exhausted people (who are now identified as being at each other’s throats, politically) have to spend Election Day together from 5:30 am until at least 8:30 when all of the ballots have been counted and returned to the board of elections.

So, I spent the day learning new words for my party (ever heard of a “re-thug-lican?”) and listening to Reagan bashing.

Hold on, I have to get a tissue.

poll workersBut, the worst part about this particular day at the polls was hearing my co-workers lament the problems in our country.  The people who spend 15 hours working for the sake of our republic are hard workers. (Mostly.) Yes, they are doing if for the $172, and their blogs.  But, they really are people who can appreciate working hard.

They were talking about the bus system in our city.  The fares are so high that people can barely afford a bus pass.  And, the routes have been dramatically reduced.  So, a person with a minimum wage job in another part of town has a really hard time just getting to work.

I know why the bus rates went up and the services went down.  Our city leaders (all democrats, who must sit around eating sub sandwiches and just dreaming up crazy ways to spend money) spent billions making one of our major streets a “corridor.”  This corridor involved making fewer lanes for cars, a specified lane for buses and cool, new, expensive stations for the buses.  Oh, and they added a bike lane.  All of those old white men in suits patted themselves on the back and then went on dreaming up more new ways to waste money.

The poor people who live in this city CAN NO LONGER AFFORD TO GET TO WORK.  Thanks, guys.

Democrat – raise taxes, spend more money, hurt everyone.

Republican – lower taxes, spend less money, help everyone.

It’s so simple.  Why can’t more people figure that out?

Since I was a “rethuglican” and couldn’t bear to hear anymore snarky comments about the Gipper (love ya, Ronnie), I didn’t mention that capitalism could fix every single one of their problems.

But, I did talk about how bad things are in Europe due to over taxation and regulation.  So, I scored a few points before I hit the snack table.

Oh, one more thing about this political balance – there really needs to be a registered Republican and a registered Democrat opening the supplies from the board of elections, checking in voters, counting ballots and giving all of the stuff back to the board of elections.


Well, there aren’t enough Republicans.  And, nobody cares!  One person just says, “Oh, I am an independent.”  And, they aren’t.  That is how poll workers can collude to perpetuate voter fraud – apathy toward the checks and balances that are in place.

Hey!  Where would they get an idea like that?

The views expressed in this opinion article are solely those of their author and are not necessarily either shared or endorsed by

About the author

Julie Love

Julie Love is a former CPA who currently home-schools her two children. She earned her MS in Journalism from Ohio University in 2002. She was raised in rural Ohio and now lives in the big city of Cleveland.
You can see more of her work at Http://
Or follow her on Twitter @loveredneck

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